If you’re like me, you still haven’t purchased holiday cards to send to your friends and family. Or, maybe you’re considering using the cards you have leftover from last year…mine feature a bottle of Maker’s Mark with a scarf around it’s neck. Pretty darn cool, actually, but not very bacony.

I was really excited when Naseem found these Shaky Bacon Christmas Cards from the Mr. Toast Etsy Store, but then incredibly deflated when I found out the cards were sold out. So here are my suggestions: 1) Let’s inundate the Mr. Toast site with requests for more cards! Surely he’ll crack under the pressure. 2) Let’s inundate Naseem with requests to create a holiday bacon card of her own, featuring the two adorable bacon folks she made me for Thanksgiving. Surely she’ll crack under the pressure.

If you’re looking for more bacon-laced holiday cheer, how about this Bacon Christmas Tree shirt? It’s festive, it’s wearable, and it’ll take people a minute to even figure out it’s made of bacon! Like one of those stereogram optical illusion posters. Remember those? They were awesome.

Or maybe you don’t celebrate Christmas. (Hi Atheists, Jews, Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists, and millions of other non-Christians!) Well, anytime’s a good time for pirates! Yes, Captain Bacon is here to pillage, plunder and set sail with all the holiday booty he can find! Join his crew of salty (and smoky) sea dogs and set a course for adventure. Yaaargh!